Thursday, September 17, 2009

Tragedy of the Loch: Loch Lomond Single Malt

What The F#@%K! No really that is what I thought the moment I took the first sip. What are the distillers even thinking releasing something like this? Do they really think something like this is even worth being labelled whisky let alone a single malt...NO it should not. Bad Loch Lomond BAD BAD BAD! For the buyer importing this trash into Australia...did you actual taste it first?! El Capitan does have a Loch Lomond 21yo Single Malt and I cannot recall its flavour, but I know it was not like this. Aged in 'old oak.' Wow that's descriptive...too cheap to buy newer ones that are not rotted out?

I seriously have nothing positive to say about the Loch Lomond (no age specified) Single Malt. I guess I better actually tell you what it was like but first a bit of history. It is hard to find anything actually on the distillery Loch Lomond nor the products. For a distiller apparently around for the last 40+ years one would expect more. What I have found I think needs to be taken with a big grain of salt because nothing seems to be solid fact and certainly is contradictory. It is apparently Captain Haddocks (of Tin Tin comic fame) favourite whiskey (but is it the Loch Lomond known now)?
The distillery also apparently has a controversial profile for sporting 4 rectifying heads and two conventional pot stills that together can produce 8 different malt whiskies (does not really make sense but hey). Other sources claim the distillery has 3 sets of stills, 2 fitted with rectification columns as well as five continuous stills. Either way apparently it is not to the rules of whiskey distilling in Scotland (sorry I really cannot find much more that seems factual).

Also I have found Michael Jackson's Tasting Notes from Whisky Magazine (not sure what these notes are about but they certainly are not relative to the current 'expression.' Maybe he was describing a ice cream from Baskin & Robbins)?
Nose: Freshly-made toast. Brandy snap.
Palate: Candy-floss (cotton-candy). Powdered sugar. Turkish delight. Pistachio nuts. Banana.
Finish: Light but long. Lemony balancing dryness.
Comment: Very sweet. Definitely a dessert whisky.

With trepidation onto the product itself I suppose . To look at it the bottle is impressive. Embossed glass and gold foil label (spent more money on the bottle than the contents).

On opening the bottle a short sniff will give a strong iodine/medicinal scent with maybe slight sweetness typical of a Highland (but not enough). The smell is actual quite off putting and reminds me a lot of dead rodent, wet dog + terribly musty. Yuck!

To taste no improvements at all. The tongue is saturated with bitter alcohol. Woody, dry, and again strong iodine/medicinal and rusty nails. The tongue tingles and the throat dries (a lot).

To finish it really can't be quick enough. I truly find no interest to return for a second sip. This is a single malt destined for the poor mans shoulder. Guaranteed this bottle will make a show at the next club meet for those that are game and willing. But really it would be good to see what others have to say because it can't be this bad...can it?

If I was to give a dram and I really don't want to then it would be 1 out of 7. I am being generous with this rating and it is purely for the look of the bottle. Shear Tragedy.

Baron Von Matt the Disappointed.